Slovenly
by TruffleChocolate
Summary: "Remember when we were kids?" -In which, strangely, Kamui does most of the talking and Kagura most of the thinking.


asdfghjkl New year :3 The world didn't end (but the zombies are coming, I fucking know it!).

So yeah, this idea has been bugging me for a long time now, just poking at me saying 'write me, write me!' and I have finally succumbed to it's annoyingness.

Bleeh...

(BTW this is not incest, ok? not even if you want it to be. But as I always say, it depends on the eyes of the reader... (and on their pervy, adorable minds))

* * *

Slovenly.

* * *

What brings us together is what pulls us apart.  
Gone our brother,  
gone our heart.

* * *

"Remember when we were kids?"

Kamui wasn't looking at her. Instead his eyes were fixated on the heavy clouds of their forgotten planet (so lonely it was, so abandoned). His voice was as it always had been; empty, but trying really hard to sound happy and bright. It made Kagura sick. He made Kagura sick.

_Every day_, she wanted to tell him. _Every fucking day._

(She remembered both the beautiful times and the dark times. Every day.)

But she kept silent. And he kept talking.

"You used to crawl into my bed and I hated it, but I never kicked you out" neither of them were holding their umbrellas even though the sky was bombarding them with rain and cold winds. Wet to the bones, they stood in front of the old rusty grave.

"I never kicked you out because I knew you needed it, my bed. You were always such a lousy and weak little sister."

_Oh, and you were always such a lovely and protective older brother, weren't you?_

"Your point?" she should be going. She had left earth without telling a soul, and that was a week ago. It took her some time to find the grave, as she had shamelessly forgotten where she had last seen it. And the ticket for the space ship had been paid with Gin-chan's life savings (he was probably freaking out; she would have liked to see his face).

"You haven't kicked me out of here" he said as if it were the most obvious statement. She bit her lip.

Indeed; she hadn't (and she wasn't going to). As much as it bothered her, he had every right to be there.

When she had finally arrived at the pitiful old tomb, after looking for it during two long days, he was already there. Tall as he was, just standing in front of it he looked almost sad, _almost_. When he noticed her she felt the hair on her neck standing and a shiver went down her spine. Kamui smiled that smile of his (so hypocrite, so _scary_) and waved a lazy hand at her.

It was then that she noticed his umbrella resting and the side of the stone. When he wasn't holding it, it looked almost fragile, as if she could just snatch it away from him and break it (so he couldn't fight anymore, so she could try to save him).

_Not today_. She understood what it meant. She wasn't using hers either.

Kagura walked to the grave and, apparently with much more confidence than her brother, sat in front of it. She rested her umbrella and took a deep breath.

Yato don't have any sort of prayers. Generally, when someone dies their bodies are left to rot in the streets. _Let them feed the worms, it's the natural course of things_. But this was their mother, or at least it had been. Kagura tried hard to remember her, but it was difficult. In the less blurry memories she looked sick and dying. After all, that's how it had been.

And just where was Kamui during those horrible nights when their mother would cough blood and barely breathe?

Kagura closed her eyes for a second. She wanted to ask him so many things (how did you find her? How do you know she died? What do you care? (Where were you, how could you leave us, how could you leave _me_?)), but the sound of rain seemed stronger than her voice, and her throat was dry, despite all the water around them.

So she kept silent. And he kept talking.

"You're starting to look more like her" he sat beside her, making her uncomfortable _and_ warm. The weather was cold after all.

"We both look like her. Be thankful we won't be as bald as that old man" it was true. The blue eyes were Umibozu's, but theirs were bigger and rounder. And the red hair…

Kamui laughed (so false, but trying, _trying_ so hard to be sincere), and the sound of it made her shiver even more. If he noticed, he ignored it.

"But you remind me of her, when she was healthy I mean."

"I don't remember" she admitted. It felt weird, talking to him so freely (almost like she could let down her guard, almost).

"Nah, you were too young."

They weren't looking at each other. She wanted to look, but then she'd probably explode in anger and break whatever was going on between them. And the silence was starting to creep around and they couldn't be there forever. They couldn't keep it together forever.

She kept silent. He started talking again (like he was _trying_ (what was he trying?)).

"How did she die?"

For a long time the question hung in the air, heavy, echoing through every broken building, every drop of water. Kagura looked intensely at the stone. It had no name and no dates; just a plain surface (how did she _die_?). She could find it because it was the only grave in the whole city, in the whole planet most likely (and how did _she die_?).

Kamui actually waited for her answer.

_If you really care, you should have been here. Fuck you and your stupid questions._

But she kept silent, and this time he did too.

(How _did she die_, Kagura?)

She didn't want to remember. It had been at night, and the coughing was so bad and the blood so much. And she was so alone. No father, no brother and soon enough (she knew, she had always known) no mother. Then a hand, pale and skinny, had patted her head gently. Kagura looked up and her Mami was there, smiling, and despite all the blood and the death around, she had looked breath takingly beautiful.

_Be strong, love_, she had said. And so Kagura stopped crying and hugged her mother until the body was cold.

(So _how did she die_?)

"In her sleep"

Kamui looked at her, and she could feel his stare. He knew she was lying (she was mad at him, did he also know that?), but let it pass.

"I loved her" his voice was so different (so lonely, so true, and so _sorry_) it made her look up. He was staring at the stone, his gaze digging into the dirt, maybe trying to see the corpse behind, and when it became obvious he couldn't, their eyes met.

"I loved her too" for a moment, she did remember when they were kids. When he teased her about how short she was, when she pulled his stupid hair and called him sissy because his braid was too long. When he carried her in his shoulders because she was tired of hunting rabbits, or when she treated to his injuries.

She remembered she used to crawl in his bed at night, after a nightmare or when she felt cold, or when she just wanted to be annoying. He always complained, but never kicked her out. It was happiness, she remembered.

But _then_ she remembered what he had done, what he had said; that he had left. And her anger came back in a rush and she looked away.

Kamui laughed again (false, but not trying anything). He stood up and patted her head. Kagura shot him a death glare.

"That's more like it" he smiled that smile of his "I'm going now. Want a ride to that sorry planet of yours? I can pay a visit to the Silver haired Samurai-san…"

Her back tensed and he laughed even more. He took his umbrella and waved at her, walking away (again, but this time she wasn't going to _beg_ him to stay and not leave her _behind_).

"See you around, sis" he disappeared in the rain.

Kagura didn't relax her back until she was sure he was completely gone, and even then, there was uneasiness in her movements. When she stood up, picked her own umbrella (so wickedly similar to his) and looked down at the grave it seemed much too small, much too fragile, and she wondered how it could resist the years without falling apart.

She didn't know; but was somehow sure that if she came back in a year or two (depending on how much Gin-chan saved) it would still be there.

(And maybe he would be there too)

* * *

Yep... asdfghafzshsdgtsj all the **feels**. I had fun writing it, and I hope you had fun reading it.

But God I need to stop writing such sad shit...

Oh, and the lyrics at the begginig are from 'Gone' by Ioanna Gika lol. (yes, it is from the movie Snow white and the huntsman lol Gotta love Chris Hemsworth)


End file.
